Another random thought I want to share this evening!

But before that.. here's a recent OOTD photo set featuring this fave women's denim shorts.  First of all, I am not trying to be a hypocrite or pabibo considering myself FAT, because I know I am not that fat. It's the fact that I got bigger compared to how I look before. Just read through this post and let me know what you think...

Top: BEA Shorts: Thrifted Shoes: Gaisano Mall Department Store

So I told you about feeling out of nowhere in my previous post. I want to share what I realized and what I learned from this.

So what really happened was, as I mentioned in my previous post, I had a small conversation with my best friend just to catch up with her. And when she asked about me, I told her I am getting fat. And then she asked me what have I been doing lately... and then I said I work, sleep, and eat. I eat when I wake up, and I wake up anytime of the day. Most of the time, I eat once or twice a day and I eat a lot. I eat whatever comes to mind. Never thinking about what's healthy or not.

After that small but deep conversation, we concluded that I might be a little depressed. I told her I feel like I am stuck and I am not going anywhere. I just work, watch KDramas, attend to my kids, sleep late or sleep early, wake up late or wake up early. And she said it's a vicious cycle.. not my routine but feeling down and feeling lost is a vicious cycle. Then she told me, why not have a short term goal, something that I can look forward to. After that conversation, I also opened up to my boss and what she told me was an eye-opener, in case you are in the same situation right now... well, read through..

So she asked me:

Where were you 10 years ago? Be honest!

I imagined myself 10 years ago. I was a mess. In toxic and unhealthy relationships, I went through a lot of troubles. I am enrolled in a University but I don't go to school. I ended up quitting college, ran away from home, I was a real headache to my father.

How about 5 years ago?

5 years ago, I had Lucas. I worked as a Customer Service Representative in a BPO company. I helped my husband, (then boyfriend) with our bills. We were getting by.

How about now?

My life now is the best I have so far. I am living my dream, with my dream job, I have a beautiful family, we're not living a luxurious life, not rich, but we're not just getting by. We're doing so good that we can provide our kids' their needs and wants.

And this is exactly what she said...

"You have constantly been growing and changing and improving and developing, life has gotten awesome (with some bumps on the road, sure)"

"If you met yourself 10, 7 or 5 years ago you would have said you were stuck and not moving forward... Even 2 years ago you'd say the same thing."

And more... those, i'm going to keep it to myself. But, I bet once in your life, or most often, you feel the exact same way.. and reading just those 2 sentences I shared, will make you realize that indeed, there's a huge difference between me, 10 years ago and me, today. I've grown so much.

"Our day to day life feels unchanging, but when we look back, we can see how far we truly have come and that translates to the future also, it's just frustrating because you don't have the perspective yet like you do when you look back"

As much as I wanna share who she is to you, I'm a bit possessive. LOL. Just kidding. I want to respect her privacy. But what she said is something I can't keep just for myself. If you are feeling the same way like I felt that day today, I hope this post made a difference and changed your perspective.

And that's it! I hope you got something from me and thank you for keeping up with me today!

Much love,